"Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to let you in."

-- Robert Frost

Saturday, June 26, 2010

E's 1!

I know, I know ... not another picture of that baby! And I apologize up front because this has the potential, at this time of night, to become mournful.


You see, a year ago tonight, she came into our lives. Planning our family had heretofore been so easy. After one came two, and then eighteen months later, number three, followed effortlessly by four and inevitably five. And then we hit a dry spell causing us to think that just maybe, despite what we felt, there were no more left in the cue for us.


We were excited to add another after such a long wait (or at least I was, but then I'm addicted to babies). A victim of not being able to slow down and take things a little easier, I ran faster than needful and Eliza's early entrance to the world cut short my work at our cub scout day camp. Funny now how I thought if I just went to sleep that night, it would all go away and I wouldn't have to tell my husband that I'd overworked myself into some real trouble ... not so funny then.

I remember being so scared. Being too early, I asked every nurse in that hospital to tell me what they thought the outcome would be. Not liking one answer, I'd tearfully turn to another for something better. But when the air hit her lungs and I heard that robust cry, I can't describe the flood of relief.


I also can't describe the irritation at having her held captive in the NICU but that's a longer story than I care to tell here.


We have literally soaked up every single moment of this girl's first year.


She's been our every source of entertainment.



I've not wanted to miss a thing. And I honestly can say, there's not one regret. I've felt a little saddened at times with some of my other babies that a little less note was taken of a baby's cuteness simply because a toddlers needs had to be met. But not this time.


I've looked at every moment as though it were the last which has had it's own pain and difficulties. I would do this forever if I could. I love it so. And I love Eliza so fiercly it hurts sometimes. Just give me a dozen more of her and I'd be the happiest mom on earth.


Happy 1st birthday, E! I'm so grateful we didn't give up on you because life just wouldn't have felt complete. You light up all of our lives and fill our hearts daily.


2 comments:

  1. Marlowe,
    She is so fabulous. I know that after all you went through to get her here, you were truly blessed. I guess I did not realize how early she was! How many weeks early, and how much did she weigh? That car seat makes her took teeny tiny!

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  2. She was teeny tiny -- just barely over four lbs. and six weeks and change early. And you're dead on, she's absolutely fabulous. Everyone should savor dessert after a full meal, right? But I guess I've gotta remember that one dessert is plenty and two is just gluttonous.

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